I learned about aging from my Mom. Through her I experienced both the good and bad of growing old.
- She retired 3 times before it took. When it snowed she loved it that she no longer had to shovel because she had to make it to work.
- She also loved the fact after retirement that she had all the time in the world to travel whether it was local or a continent away.
- I also learned how a body can betray you when dealing with rheumatism arthritis. It was heart wrenching at times to see her frustrated because she could not get her hands to work or crying herself to sleep because she was in so much pain.
Most importantly I learned my faith from my Mom. She taught me and showed me the power of prayer and the feeling of peace that comes when either attending mass or saying the rosary. She showed me how wonderful it was to have a relationship with God and a church to call home.
Lastly I learned about death from my Mom. She taught me it was nothing to be feared and while she did not want to leave her family her, she was looking forward to seeing her family that had already passed. She talked about it openly, made sure the family knew her wishes and left everything organized for us for after she died. I had to laugh that when I went to get the folder with her will and other important paperwork. In it she also left me a series of articles she had cut out from various magazines about what to do when someone passes. It was wonderful to learn one more thing from my Mom.
So while I miss her so much I felt honored that as she was there for my first breath and my brother’s first breath that both of us were with her for her last breath. She passed peacefully just the way she wanted.
On behalf of myself and my family I would like to extend our appreciation and gratitude for everyone coming together to help us celebrate my Mom’s life and I invite everyone to join us in the Parish hall after the mass to continue in the celebration.

I’ve thought about that phrase quite a bit since Judith passed. She adored her grandchildren. Judith and Rachel regularly took Aislinn and Braedan to shows at the Kennedy Center and for overnight visits. When the they would return, you could see the joy in Judith’s face as the kids shared tales of their outings. And boy did they have outings! I’m not exactly sure who was the brains behind all the trips, but I do know that the grandchildren were blessed with a lifetime of memories that include trips to all things Disney, New York, California, and the Kennedy Center.

Judith truly enjoyed traveling. I think part of that came from her hunger for knowledge. She was a voracious reader and was sharp as a tack. I don’t think there was anything she didn’t know, and if there was, she could certainly tell you all about it as though she was the expert. I think for her, the experience of something new was what mattered. It wasn’t the snapshots in time that many of us rely on for memories. She didn’t need those. What she needed was to see, learn, and do. She simply carried the memories with her.

Many of Judith’s travels involved a mouse named Mickey and a very large ship. When the whole family could go, the trips were extra special. It’s so easy for us to get absorbed in our own day to day worlds that setting aside the time for a family trip helped us feel a connection that wasn’t always apparent. One of my favorite trips, however, didn’t include anyone named Mickey. It was a Thanksgiving trip to her brother Hoot’s house. It was so refreshing and fun to see Judith with her brother. Aside from laughing so hard my sides hurt because Hoot is truly “funnier than a rubber crutch,” I got to see a side of Judith I hadn’t seen: the little sister who loved her big brother. What a gift to have a sibling you can laugh and have fun with when you’re all grown up. What a blessing to have time to tap into your inner child when so much of our lives is spent being responsible.

I was able to spend time with Judith the day she passed. Due to a scheduling mix-up on my part, the coffee date I planned with her for Wednesday was moved to Thursday. I arrived shortly after ten with an almost perfect temperature cup of Joe from Dunkin’ Donuts – cream and sugar. She smiled and her eyes got bright when she saw the cup. “Oh, thank you!” she said, “a good cup of coffee!”

I simply replied, “If I’d have known it was this easy to put a smile on your face, I would have come sooner!” and we both laughed a little. Judith was tired, and she was ready. It was just a matter of time until she was sure those she left behind knew what to do and would be ok. I think my job that day was to sit with her, share memories, listen, and assure her that all would be well. She fought the good fight and raised some very amazing children who were smart and ready for what was to come. And they are.

No one is ever truly ready for a loved one to pass from this life to the next, no matter how much time we have to prepare. We may understand the logistics needed and the steps to follow, but the reality is often far more different than anything we can imagine. There is comfort in knowing that one day, we’ll meet again on the other side, once we’ve finished what we came here to do.

As I waited for Brian and Rachel to arrive, I held Judith’s hand and gently spoke to her. I said, “Judith, you are about to go on the best Disney ship you have ever seen. We are going to miss you, but we will all hold each other up and will be ok. Let’s imagine you are sitting with your feet up at Castaway Cay. The sun is shining and there is a fabulous ocean breeze. And a very handsome young man is walking by carrying a tray of tasty frozen drinks.”

That’s where I picture her now – with a big smile on her face, looking over us as she embarks on the most amazing Disney Cruise she’s ever taken. And she will be there to greet us one day when we arrive, with a cheery “Hi, gang!” to start our next trip together.